Mothering Babbles

So Honey, what did you do all day?

It’s very difficult to type with a wee baby laying on me, belly-to-belly and fast asleep. But, I’ll take what I can get.

 Here’s the thing: babies don’t care what’s convenient for you. This isn’t surprising though, given that 0 out of 116 people polled had babies because they wanted life to be more convenient. People have babies for all kinds of reasons. I like lists, so lets recall some.

  •      They think they are cute

  •      It seemed like a good idea at the time

  •      God said to go forth and multiply

  •      It’s what their parents did, and their parents-parents did

  •      Its what their friends were doing

  •      Babies make life more interesting

  •     Babies give you purpose

  •      Why not?

  •       Free baby samples

  •      It’d be interesting to see what their own mini-me looked like

  •      Baby fever

  •     It’s what society expects

  •      It’s what their spouse expects

  •     Maternity leave is basically baby vacation.

Let’s just clear the air and say that these are not necessarily reflective of my and my husband’s reasons for child-bearing, nor is this list exhaustive. But, I WILL admit that my husband DID refer to mat leave as baby-vacation (pre-baby) and now takes back that statement. Thank you, Greg.

I’m getting better at this doing nothing thing. And, by doing nothing I mean doing an incredible amount of things for the sake of keeping my baby alive, happy and developing but in the real world not actually accomplishing everyday tasks. It was really hard at first, like really really hard. I don’t mean caring for baby, although that was a whole different kind of hard.

I’ve always been a go-getter. I’ve always needed to be. If I wasn’t in school, I was working, and if I wasn’t working I was working my other job, and if I wasn’t working my other job I was planning a baby shower, or bridal shower, or volunteering or planning some kind of event. I couldn’t sit still.As I sat down I would feel a pang of guilt, so I would get up and do something else.

So now, here I am 4 months into motherhood and I am s l o w l y getting there. At first it was guilt, shame and embarrassment and how little I could get done. No housework, cooking, planning, working, odd jobs or to-do lists getting done. No achievements. And then somehow, slowly, I learned that it is okay.

Growing this little human and being everything to her is the best kind of achievement! How lucky I am to have this opportunity. How blessed I am to have her! To the outside world I may be a nothing-doer, but for my family and I…I am Wonderwoman, The Incredible Hulktress, and Shaquille O’neal of my baby, and of my life.

 Why? Because today I…

Woke up, fed my baby, changed her bum, ate breakfast, put my hair in a clip, changed my underwear (and some clothes), played with my baby, played more, rocked some, walked some, hushed some, cried some, and then fed her again. I blogged, logged in, paid bills, fed the dog, and went to the bathroom (yes!). It might already be 3:30 in the afternoon and to look in my window you might think to yourself “What does she do all day?” , but my baby and I are alive and well and that’s what matters most right now.

So well done to me, well done to you, and remember…

You ARE doing something, and you’re doing fantastic!

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